In episode 52, I talk about the biggest time-sinks in business that take you away from your family and what you can do to avoid them.
These are the people who just want your attention and keep you around as long as they can. Know when the line is crossed and you’re no longer involved in meaningful interaction and when you’re with someone who tends to take up a lot of your time with useless conversation that takes time away from your work and your family.
Do you check your email every hour? Do you respond to an email as soon as it comes in? By checking your phone, your emails, and any other communication all the time and immediately responding, you’re losing a ton of time! Turn those alerts off and try checking your email twice a day on the average day to cut this time off and focus on more important tasks.
By switching between various tasks - between checking emails or taking calls, working on smaller projects while taking breaks on bigger ones - can really take up your time. Instead, take an hour and a half to really dive into a piece and get it done completely before moving onto the next thing on your to-do list.
In episode 51, I dig into the meat of why I made this podcast in the first place: three steps you can take to make sure you get the best of both worlds without sacrificing your business for your family or the other way around.
You have to believe that you can have it all. It HAS to happen. When you make it absolutely essential to succeed, you’ll start making little choices that get you there.
There are always people out there who will think they know better than you do and who try to shut down your dreams. Don’t take advice from people who don’t get what you really want.
It can be really hard to keep going after you’ve made a few mistakes. You’ll mess up, and that’s okay. Learn from each mistake to move forward and not make the same mistake again.
In episode 45, I cover the really tough topic of how you can get your business done without feeling like you’re sacrificing your kids - and therefore, get rid of the stress and guilt about it. This episode talks about four specific actions you can take to make this happen, even when you’re working crazy hours.
Get your family’s opinions on things and include them on what’s going on with your business. Your kids may show you something novel and amazing you haven’t considered - and then they feel like they’re a part of your business and your life.
This is crucial. Give them reasons to understand why you’re so busy. Most entrepreneurs know why they’re doing what they’re doing, but rarely to they say it to their families. It’s hardly a surprise your family doesn’t understand your dream or vision.
Make sure your kids have a real connection with you and know you’re a real person with real emotions and limitations. This not only gives them perspective on where you’re coming from, but it gives them the freedom to be real people, too.
Don’t hold your guilt inside. Your kids may need to hear what you’re feeling, why you’re feeling it, and what you’re thinking about. This can also open up conversations and help your kids think about things more completely.
In episode 40, I talk about how to keep your family the biggest fans of you and your business by sharing your excitement, checking in with them personally, leaving notes and giving gifts, and keeping your family’s goals in your planning.
Keep your family involved in the business by sharing what’s exciting you and asking for advice on simple things like logo designs or color schemes. They’ll love and appreciate being involved.
By continually taking a few minutes of time to talk to each member of your family individually to ask about their day and show interest in your life, you’re showing them they matter.
This doesn’t have to be expensive, and in fact maybe it shouldn’t be. Little things like picking up your kid’s favorite candy bar when you’re in the checkout line at the store show them you’re always thinking about them.
Similarly, little notes in kids’ lunches or on the mirror for your wife in the morning show them that they matter and keep your family connected.
When you’re goal planning, don’t forget to add family goals into the mix to make sure your family and what they want is always prioritized.
In episode 39, I dig into an important topic: how to keep your family strong and together when your business is booming and you need to dedicate a lot of time to it. Learn to balance how to share in your excitement without upsetting your family and how they can share in the growth.
This sets the stage for the other six steps. You may know it’s started if business demands increase, your “must-do” list gets longer, and your family may be grumpy with you.
Figure out what effect this will have on you, your schedule, and your business. Determine how the growth benefits you and your family.
Tell them what’s going on from step two. Be open with them and don’t hold it back.
Show them how when the company wins, they win, and remind them that’s why you’re doing this in the first place.
Make plans that your family will love and make sure you stick to them! The last thing you need now is to let them down by being flaky.
When you’re excited about your business growing, share it with them in a way they understand that gets them excited, too!
In Episode 33, I talk about the amazing kind of people you want in your life, from the optimist to the friend to the partner. These are the kinds of people that will help you thrive in business and make you happier at home.
This is the person who is the best to throw new ideas by. They get you inspired and they can see really great things happening in new opportunities.
I see my friends of fans of mine - and I am fans of theirs. We enjoy and believe in each other. These allow me to do more with them than I can do on my own.
This is everything you see in the friends - they believe in you, they’re your fan, and they see your potential - but this person also shares your ups and downs.
In episode 31, I talk about something a little hard for some of us to do but critically important to keeping our businesses and our families happy and healthy. These three kinds of people usually cause more harm than good in our lives and should be limited to make sure we’re successful - both as business owners and as parents.
This person will kill motivation - theirs and yours. They see the world as unrelenting and horrible, and they want you to see it from their perspective. Note: many of them hide behind the phrase, “I’m just a realist,” but sometimes, these “realists” are really just negative people.
These people are so caught up in how they’re perceived that they will do whatever it takes to make themselves look good - even if they aren’t doing anything valuable at all. They do this in business and in personal relationships, essentially becoming unreliable.
Note: it’s not just the people who create drama, it’s the people who can create drama out of seemingly nothing. Managing this person or dealing with all the things they want to obsess over can drag you down. It creates a lot of anxiety and stress you don’t need.
In episode 27, we talk about how our kids pick up on what we say and do automatically, which means we may find them displaying unwanted behavior they learned by watching us. Here are four things we may be misleading our children about.
We all say this, but a lot of the time we spend way more time working than we do spending time with our families. Instead, remind them that time does not determine value and that the reason you work is so you can enable your family to get to spend more awesome, quality time together.
When we’re busy, we tend to let ourselves slip on our healthy diets. Our kids watch us eat junk food while we tell them to eat their vegetables. Instead, find healthier snacks for yourself and explain to your kids what the costs are for you not eating well.
We ruin this every time we make up an excuse about why we can’t make it somewhere, or when we tell them to tell the people at the phone we’re not home. It’s your prerogative to explain these to your kids to help them see what’s going on.
Ranting about your job or a client is basically the same thing. When they see you get angry and unreasonable, they think it’s okay for them to do it, too. Find a way to make your rants constructive instead of just irrational.
In episode 19, we cover the hard-learned lesson that being busy does NOT equal being successful. By answering every phone call and filling up my time with busy work, I was taking away from not only my family, but from my business, too.
If you make sure all your task items (business AND personal) are prioritized based on what will have the most effect on your life, your business, and your relationships with your family.
You can find out what tasks are actually damaging your business and your family, and get rid of those things!
Write everything you get to do to get to where you want in your life: Everything you want to accomplish for yourself, your family, and your business. Then create a list of must-completes - the things you absolutely MUST do to move forward in your life.
Finish your list first and foremost - before you make calls, send emails, or take any walk-ins! This goes for your business AND your family!
In episode 15, we cover a bit more about what we talked about in episode 14 - why it’s important to leave the stress of your business out of your family life. This time, we focus on how you can achieve that goal to take care of you, your family, and your business.
In Episode 14, we cover the 3 big reasons you need to leave stress at the door when you come home after work. There’s a delicate balance between sharing your business and bringing negative feelings home at the end of the day, and without knowing that balance, you could be scaring your family.
In this episode, I go over some of the often-forgotten benefits to being a self employed parent, from your flexible schedule to the fact that you’re your own boss. Even though it can be a real challenge, it’s important we remember the great gifts being a self employed parent gives us and our families.
In episode seven, I talk about something a lot of us don’t have much of anymore: time to ourselves. This episode covers why it’s so important for us to get downtime, how we can know when we need to take some time to ourselves, and how to do it when it feels like we’re up to our ears in work appointments and kids’ baseball games.
Learn what Self Employed Parent is all about and discover what led me to the place I’m at now: from a struggling startup owner with no time for his family to a thriving, multi-business entrepreneur who never misses a game.